Wash condoms inside out to preserve freshness

Well, I did it again. I washed my condoms in the washing machine.

Whenever I go out I put two condoms in my right side pocket 'cause you never know if you might get lucky. Why two? Well, it started years ago when I realised that putting on a condom was quite difficult. So I thought to myself that I better bring along two in case I f**k it up the first time (and not in the good way). I now have no problems in putting the thing on but since then have realised that if you bring two you can score once more in the morning as well.
Wait, why the right side pocket? Well, I usually wear jeans and the right side is the one with the really small pocket inside the big one. I don't know what it is called. I call it the rubber pocket.

So anyway, I came home from clubbing, without having scored, and took my pants off. The next day I decide to throw 'em in the washing machine. Later on when I go to take them out I see two silver foil things in the bottom of the washing machine. It was the two condoms I had had in my pocket. F**k it! Now I have to get new ones 'cause I only had one left. Which brings me to my next complaint.

My brand comes in packs of 5 (or 25 but I am not that optimistic). But the "average" one night stand requires at least 2 rubbers (for me anyway). So you have two and a HALF one-nighters in one pack, although technically I suppose it isn't a one night stand if you do it in the morning as well. It would be a lot better if they had 6 in one pack, which would also be appropriate since the number 6 is pronounced "sex" in my native tongue.

Another thought I had recently was about the cost of sex. A pack of condoms is relatively cheap and the price of one is about 70 cents. However!!! I have calculated the average of times I have to go out to find a one nighter....At this point my sister is probably thinking "waaay too much info here"...anyway, the average is at 13% so I have to go out 7,69 times (in reality 8) to "get some". I usually spend about 10-15 bucks on tickets, drinks etc..Probably average around 12.
So that comes to 12x8+0,70x2=97,4 Euros (a bit more than 100 US dollars).

Now I am a bit depressed.

Queer eye for the Straight clubber

I had an epiphany yesterday while watching my favourite tv show, Queer Eye for the Straight guy. The whole point of the show is not to transform someone into what they are not but rather to make them into the best of what they already are. If they hate wearing suits and love jeans and t-shirts the point is to find the best possible pair of jeans and the best t-shirt.

Well, here is my epiphany; why not approach clubbing the same way?
Why not view it as a lifestyle of sorts instead of just a way of getting laid (as I have done in the past). Take this weekend for instance.

I started partying on friday, almost by accident. Went out again on saturday. Sunday rolled around and I went back to the bar, even though I was supposed to get up at 7 the next day. Then because of the holiday on tuesday (independence day) I went out again on monday.

The thing is I met quite a few interesting people. Fun folks. I am sure alcohol had something to do with it though as people tend to relax more then. Anyway, I also got a VIP-invitation to my regular club even though I am not technically a "Gold member".

SO all of this got me thinking about it; why not try to be the best god damn clubber I can be? I could try to get to know more of the people in the staff at various clubs. Socialize more than just trying to pick up chicks. Get the best club clothes I can etc. Just go for it all out man!

I think it would come easily for me as I tend to do everything all out no matter what I do.

Of course this would all boil down to getting chicks because "social proof" (knowing people, having connections) is a good character trait you can have.

I could become a clubbing superhero...or legend of sorts...or a sad pathetic character people laugh at behind my back. Either way, I win :p